Let's be honest, our true Lord and Savior is Guy Fieri. You might not like it, but it's a fact. Here's the Gif that summarizes your astrological sign.
Aries (March 21- April 20) : Aries is the first sign of the zodiac which means you're pretty pretentious and you think you're better than everyone else. You're leaders which also means you're bossy and act like a know it all pretty much all of the time. Aries are enthusiastic or also that one person in the office that has way too much energy in the all hands on deck work meeting that you just want to end, but they wont stop with the ass kissing questions.
Taurus (April 21-May 21): Taurus is the second sign of the zodiac, and just like being the middle child you want to remind everyone how hard your life is and that mom and dad don't love you as much. You're solid and fight for what you want aka you're annoying. We get it. Knock it off. Shocker, you're also stubborn. You're a procrastinator but also have good work ethic so you're gonna get the project done but you're not sending it off to you co-workers until 4:59 pm. Cause you're an awful person to work with.
Gemini (May 22-June 21): Two faced bitches.
Cancer (June 22- July 22): You inconsistent bitches. You enjoy security but also seek adventure which means YouTube videos of other people traveling the world while you lay in bed is as much of the world as you'll ever see. Even though you'll lie about it on your Tinder profile.
Leo (July23- August 21): You're self centered and full of yourself. Plus you're the person no one wants in the office because all you do is bring your baby daddy drama. Like Karen no one cares that he has a new girlfriend, lets be honest she's his second cousin and we all think that's weird already. Stop reminding us.
Virgo (August 22- September 23): You're the weirdos plotting to do something illegal. You're the one were nice to even though when we don't want to be because honestly were a little afraid of you. Lets just say no one would be surprised if you showed up to work in a trench coat.
Libra (September 24- October 23): You get along well with everyone aka you're fake to try to make friends but no one actually trusts you. You have expensive taste because you're materialistic, which means that you're just looking for a sugar daddy. Honestly I don't blame you. Get it girl.
Scorpio (October 24- November 22): You're the psychos of the zodiac. Charles Mansion was a scorpio. Don't believe me? Google it, I'm not taking the time out of my day to link the article. They may be psychos but they're great in bed so you take what you can get, am I right?
Sagittarius (November 23-December 22): Now onto the BEST zodiac sign of the whole gang. Sag is the world traveler, the optimist, the most beautiful and regal girl you'll ever catch. Very blunt so they're not afraid to tell you that you're tacky and they hate you. Totally self-confident and can out wit anyone with their stellar humor. And I know what you're thinking, no, my Sagittarius friend did NOT write this - it's just the truth and you can't handle it. Bye bitches.
Capricorn (December 23- January 20): You love to pretend that you're a hard worker when in fact Susan, YOU DON'T DO S**T AROUND HERE. We all know it. You act like you've put in a hard day's work but we can see on Facebook that you're looking for lives in your puzzle games that you can't get past level 73. 73 SUSAN. Your assistant needs a break Susan. SHES DOING ALL OF YOUR WORK SUSAN. Susan she signs YOUR NAME to HER WORK.
Aquarius (January 21- February 19): They don't care what other people think about them, which makes them think that they have an open invitation to be a dick, like, all of the time. They think they know the right way to do everything so if an Aquarius asks you to load the dishwasher don't worry about how you do it, you didn't do it right, and they'll redo it.
Pisces (February 20 March 20): You crybaby bitches. You're so sensitive. Constantly escaping reality because you can't face the fact that you got stood up on another Tinder date. Go eat directly out of the ice cream tub like the rest of us and get over it. There's people that are dying Kim.
Also, we clearly came up with all of these don't come for us.